Friday, September 9, 2011

What a week!

To some extent I can’t help but think that it’s good I don’t have a boyfriend right now otherwise I would have driven him crazy. But oh boy, grabe.  Last Wednesday, I remember just sobbing while refueling at Shell Fort, stopping to drive off then continuing after parking at Valle Verde. I couldn’t help but feel tired. Overwhelmed. Uninspired.  And I begged God for Magic to come back into my life.  Isabel’s good bye note saved me that night. She said I inspired her, and went on to say how I changed her life in the 3 months that I had her as my intern. Heavy stuff right. But at the same time I felt mollified.  Finally someone appreciates me. Is my need for attention justified? Or am I just being KSP. After all, I’m getting into GO on expat (lite) basis and being assigned abroad. So in a way that is Shell showing its appreciation to me. SO maybe I just need to have Magic back again in my life.

God didn’t stop with Isabel though. Today I finally receive communications from the German Embassy.  I’m being asked to surrender my passport for them to put in my work visa. And then I can go.  How excited I was when Kier, our Admin Assistant, knocked and told me a messenger had something for me from the German Embassy. I would have ripped off the plastic wrap, except that I managed to muster enough self-control to get a pair of scissors and snip off the wrap.  Thank you God. I needed the boost.

With the letter from the Embassy though the my imminent departure is starting  to get real.  And sometimes I get gripped with a bit of panic. Don’t get me wrong. I so want to GO already. New life, new challenges, new friends. But I can’t help but worry that I’ll be all alone there. And what about all that I’m leaving behind here. What happens next?  Anyhow, I roughly have 20 days to go… OMG, 20 DAYS LEFT?!

Yes, see. Panic moments…

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